9 Things To Never Say to a Survivor of Abuse

No one wants to talk about it. The topic is uncomfortable. Sexual assault and exploitation is never something we want to discuss. We change the subject or avoid the statistics, but it’s hard to ignore when a loved one shares a survivor story. So, when they do, how we respond is crucial.

According to the Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network (RAINN), sexual assault and exploitation is as an unwanted or forced sexual act committed without consent. Every 73 seconds, an American is sexually assaulted, and every nine minutes, the victim is a child. When a woman or man is assaulted, they lose their power and their voice. This makes talking about sexual abuse or exploitation difficult for survivors.

Some survivors wait years and decades for the right opportunity to tell their story. The first person may be family a member or friend. When they do, they need a compassionate and caring response. Think of the way Jesus responded to the woman at the well or the woman accused of adultery brought before Him in the streets of Jerusalem. Jesus poured out love and compassion, not accusations or condemnation.

If a survivor shares their story of abuse, we must be careful to respond like Jesus, with love and compassion. Our first words could help or harm. To help you find the right words and avoid words that harm, here are 9 things to never say to a survivor of abuse:

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